Let the sun do the blinding

“Because in optimism there is actually a seed of yearning, because optimism it does not mean avoiding the sense of the tragic, but face the tragic with another attitude, simply. That's why laughing becomes more beautiful. Believing becomes more beautiful. Believing in ourselves and each other becomes more beautiful. Building becomes more beautiful.” – Lorenzo Cherubini*, better known as Jovanotti, Italian singer-songwriter

My father maintains the position that one’s attitude defines their life. His sage advice has saved me a few times and I think it’s also why I’m drawn to understanding the importance of a more hopeful outlook.

The town square in Baunei, Sardegna where I met Signore Pietro in June, 2018. Copyright Elena Iacono, 2018.

This past summer, I met 96-year old Signore Pietro while visiting a small town in Sardegna. I spotted him while on my way to a local café for an espresso. I waved, he waved back. We naturally started chatting and I was reminded of how much our outlook sets the path for our well-being and our future. 

“We have a responsibility to ourselves to stay hopeful. I’ve had great days and I’ve had bad days but I’ve always made it a point to be careful of how I convey my thoughts not just to others but to myself too,” Signore Pietro explained.

He went on: “Life’s busy enough – we need to stay positive as it keeps us focused and encouraged. A positive attitude is inspiring – why not culminate more hope in our lives to bring about impactful potential for change?”  

I often think about where optimism comes from and its affects. Some scholars maintain that we’re born as natural optimists who are primed for a good life**. Others maintain that we’re the product of our environment and its influences shape our views. The question becomes: when things come up, how do you react? 

Do you give up, or do you have the courage to think and work it through it? Do you feel your events are temporary or long-term? Do you take responsibility for your feelings or do you push accountability onto others? 

Being an optimist is less about simply wearing a smile and more about the mind-set you adopt to help create meaning about your experience – helping you evolve.  

Optimists tend to focus on the good – learning for future growth and focusing on positive outcomes even when things are hard. All of this pays off for our morale and our health. Research suggests that optimists are better able to contain their stress levels which translates into a stronger immune system and better physical and psychological health**. What’s more, optimists are great sources of inspiration for others too – they take action. They refuse to sit idle. No is not an option. 

Signore Pietro explained that he’s always been aware of the impact he has on others. In fact, high-hope people have a healthy concern about the impressions they make on others. In other words, they’re careful and deliberate when connecting with people so as to not discourage, deflate or weaken**. Whether he’s with his siblings or his friends, Signore Pietro maintains an enthusiastic attitude “because anything less signals that life’s not worth trying. And this is wrong. It is.” 

A helpless attitude is debilitating. It freezes us and holds us back from acting with purpose. Negative emotions tank our self-esteem, fuel self-doubt and tax our well-being.

A calm Sunday in September shot on location at the Bronte Creek Provincial Park in Oakville, Ontario. Copyright Elena Iacono, 2018.

We’re better than this.

I don’t dismiss the fact that life’s occurrences are sometimes challenging. However, let’s have the courage to dispel any blinding thoughts if and should they arise. The only thing that should be blinding us is the sun as we look up towards a source of inspiration for a brighter way. 

A very close friend of mine has experienced some tough moments and yet his sureness for a better tomorrow is beyond anything I’ve ever seen. He’s an inspiration to me because without reservation, he maintains his braveness and looks forward to what’s to come. In the way that he describes his plans, you know he’s made a promise to himself to keep going full speed ahead.  

When things come up both professionally and personally, accepting our reality is half the battle. The other half is about having the courage to keep thriving.

Pay attention to how you talk to yourself; reflect on what’s gone well for you so far. An experience serves one purpose and one purpose alone – to help you grow. Step back, take a breath and visualize your best future because when you map it out, and you believe in it, you can feel it. 

Let’s make a commitment to look for the good and be inspired by the power of opportunity. If our outlook affects our well-being, why waste time on living any other way? 

I’m not. 

 This is the fifth edition of One with the Blue – the aim is to share examples of how emotional well-being is supported in a region where people are living happy and healthy lives. 

Works cited: 

*Cherubini, Lorenzo, TEDx, Optimism as a kind of fight - TEDxFirence

**Carver, Charles S., Scheier, Michael F., Miller, Christopher J., Fulford, Daniel, Optimism. The Oxford Handbook of Positive Psychology, New York, 2009 

Edited by: V. Centofanti and J. Thompson (thank you)